"So what's up? Oh sh#t, you've gotten so fat!"

Well, I stumbled upon Mike Way's myspace page and saw blogging in it's truest form so I had to hop on mine. Jesus, if you haven't seen him blog, go check that shiggity out and see what it means to BLOGGG!
Feel Good
Lizard should be fun on Saturday, and maybe I'll have on a thong. Maybe. Nah, but talking of sex appeal makes me want to point out what a piece of ass women have been treating me like that past week.
Feel Good
My ex broke my heart and maybe we all need the assurance of other people to say " Hey, hey, look at me.... I'd f#ck your toenail polish off." I think we just need that after crumblin' within the chest. I'd give examples of these pieces(cause one is most definitely a 10) but that would be rude to them.
Feel Good
So.... "Who the f@ck is Tyler Richardson?" A man who wakes up and says "Today, I kidnap some one's child and hold them for ransom..... then I'm one step closer to buying metallic legs!" Yeah. Yeah.
Feel Good
I went to Marymount University and Keith the Comedian was with. By the way, Keith bought Musiq Soulchild's new album LuvandMusiq, which made me immediately go out and get that shiggity the next day. Back to this "talent(?) show", so we were both received well and guess who went before anyone else.... Tyler. Bittah!(yet again pronounced like bitter, but with soul) So, the guy who is bald and sets up the comedy shows there is behind us now to actually perform for the college next semester. Had to prove ourselves but I think we both liked the challenge. HA! There was so many fine women all over that place and at the time I was still playing it timid. Oh, to go back in time. Just ass all over the place. And, we watched as a kid that seemed like an alright sort, performed a whole 7 min. of Dane Cook's Retaliation. It was an out of body experience. Because, while part of me sat there, my spirit walked on stage and had a giant cane with which to hank him out of his F#$%ing shoes. But, it's all good, the part of me still sitting there was numbed by this one African girl's B.O. Oh, it was something. She had on a dress with the shoulders out. I was catchin' the full affect.... Shiggity.
Feel Good

Well, laters everyone... and keep smiling. The feel good thing is part of The Secret.

Let's play catch up...

Okay, so it's been a little bit, let's catch up...

The Sampson show on March 11th was one of the more fun shows that I think I've gotten to be a part of as of right now. Nick found some beer in the back and that was what would be the beginning of a beautiful night. Everyone was funny and the audience was receptive. Kudos to everyone that was on the show, ROCK THE F@CK ON!

I'm steppin' my suit game up and oh, I look sharp in a suit baby. Pictures will come when I've picked them up. Tailoring...

24 was awesome last night. You don't just leave Jack Bauer in the dark about his main squeeze being dead. You just don't. Kill for me Jack, kill for me.

My dog Max is still the sexiest bastard on God's green earth.

I have given up cigarettes and weed. Weed is only temporary but the fags are pretty permanent. I may smoke one here and there, but a smoker I am no more.

The last blog or two might have seemed a little bitter.... I apologize. Jermaine Fowler and I joke about how my name should be BITTER(pronounced BITTAA). But, trust me, I got nothin' but love for all of my fellow comics. Sometimes we just step outside of ourselves. I hope you understand.

Lizard- March 31. Jermaine and I are going to have fun, and if you aren't doing anything please drop by and see if you like what we have in mind. Marymount University- tonight. J and myself yet again. 9:55- May 13th. Love Richmond. I gotta put some more stuff on this list, but the summer is a time for lovin', let Tyler share some with you.

I have God of War 2.... YEAH BITCH.

Jimmy Meritt, your a patriot. Reading your blogs has always been a pleasure, do what you do baby.

Jermaine says that I ramble less now that I don't smoke. Catch 22 people, Catch 22.

I need to do this a lot more regularly, so let me save some for tomorrow. Laters.....

Just wanted to say "Hello"

Has been a moment, hasn't it. Thank you to those that have contacted me in the past few weeks and I really do appreciate that. Don't get me wrong, there were only a few, but they had words that I definitely needed to hear. I think I'm ready with new stuff to show off the whole me. But, enough talk I'll just have to show people.

On another note, let me follow up a story that I commented on a long time ago. My best friend Nelson was worried that he would be fired over a BLOG that he wrote where I said, among other things, that he would like to punch his boss in "The fucking throat". I wrote that he deleted that blog and not more than a couple weeks after that he was fired. I kills me that in this day and age someone can actually be let go for a BLOG. Sad.

Is Curt Shackelford's E-Mail Dead?......

When I was about 10, I hit my first homerun and when I connected with the ball, I shit. It was a lot of shit too. I ran the bases, then while everyone was still giving me congrats at home plate.... I just kept running home. Home was not anywhere close to where we were playing and my mother was in attendance too. Just a memory that makes me laugh that I thought I would share with you. Are we too mature to admit that shit is ALWAYS funny.

Well, for the three that care, I just wanted to blog and let them know I'm not dead and get ready for new shit...
By the way, at the DCAC this Sunday:
1. Sampson (host)
2. Jermaine Fowler
3. Tyler Sonnicshen
4. Tyler Richardson
5. Nick Mullen
6. Keith "The Comedian"
7. Travis Johnson
8. Marcus "DooDooh" Brown
9. Jason Weems

Just saw this lineup today, the arrogant side of me is looking at this order and saying "Fuck me". The humble part says the same fucking thing... I'm a dick. Bout' time I stopped pretending. I'm gonna have more fun with this comedy thing and look less seriously at it. Maybe next time I do something I'll be the shaft and not the bell end. If you don't get it, be glad.
To any new comics that are discouraged due to being unrecognized as funny, let these lyrics remind you that it doesn't matter how many opportunities pass you by, do you...
My words are weapons
I use 'em to crush my opponents
These words are weapons
I never did show no emotion
My words are weapons
I use 'em to kill whoever's steppin to me
My words are like weaponry on a record
Yo, the rage I release on a page
is like a demon unleashed in a cage
Lunatic, soon as I hit the stage
My mind is like a fuckin stick of dynamite
Onen I get behind the mic
it's like the wick is lit you bitches die tonight
My nine is like a guidin light at night shinin bright
My fuckin grip is tighter than my wife's vagina, psych
These cock-suckin cops got my Smith-N-Wesson...
I guess it's time to pick a different weapon, man the shit's depressin...
But my plan is to use this bullshit to my advantage
Shady stay creative baby hold your head up, don't you let up
one bit on these motherfuckin suckers you're a soldier +GET UP+
STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN, LONG AS YOU BREATHIN
THEY JEALOUS OF YOU MAN THAT'S THE ONLY REASON THEY BEEFIN!

do what you do man, you know if it's funny or not....